After being part of the team I’m still not part of it

An outcast feeling still lingers. I’m added to the Distribution List to receive the spam mails which the group receives on daily basis in the name of “Project Updates” BUT I’m still an outsider.

They will plan trips or ordering food exactly at times when I’m leaving office. Thus, ensuring I get to know the plan but can’t participate also.

Rude and Mean I tell you!

Is it lull before a storm?

Suddenly everything is quiet and still. No news or anything happening. Did I finally achieve peace and solitude which I craved for? Did I finally manage to get rid of fair weather friends and distractions? Should I feel happy that I have finally the mental peace and can divert my energy to my hobbies and my favorites? I’m not sure still.

In personal front, it’s surely a good sign maybe.

But on professional front? No training happening, no news of me being put in production happening. It seems like they are deliberately making me do time pass for some reason. I can’t fathom why?

When on other hand they are saying they have requirements but not allowing more people to join production too.

Are they chucking me out just for the heck of it or wasting my time so that I quit?

It’s evident they have no intention of making people permanent especially when they can get cheap labor as contractors.

Hmm….Just waiting and watching

Transparency in cio

Yeah, sounds creepy and cool at the same time. Among team members, it seems that everyone knows practically everything about the other and what’s happening around. Which at times is intrusion of privacy but no choice. As for the supervisors and managers, they can be real crafty. It’s difficult to figure what’s going on and can be unpredictable and nasty.

Too much vulgarism and flirt behavioral is there which they mask in the form of playful or casual attitude. Difficult to figure or react at times, especially if the other is senior and can go out of their way to screw your career.

Difficult times!

I don’t talk- as said by my current sup Deepu

Yeah. He can be real puzzling at times. If I am at ease and make myself comfortable at office he has to remark that I’m not serious.

If I pretend to be all serious n dead at office, he complains I don’t talk and I’m very quiet. There’s something wrong.

What the hell do I do now?

Decide fast people what do you want exactly and then mess with my head.

Life falling on to a routine

Life is falling into some routine of sorts nowadays. Most predictable and settled during weekdays it seems. 

Here is the brief:-

8-9 AM :- Wake up, wash clothes (optional), get ready for office.

9-9.15 – Call home , board cab

9.15-10.15 – Listen to radio, read library book, chat with fellow cab-mates

10.15-10.45 – Reach office, buy coffee from Auo Bon Pain and read newspaper in the lobby

10.45-12 – login to system, greet collegues, get briefed up on work n all

12-12.30 – Go through mails, go to breakout 

1.30 – Lunch

2-6 – Stare others systems as part of training

After 6 take small break and again continue staring at the monitor

8.30 Rush towards lift for going to the parking lot

8.30-850 Board cab, call home, send some sms

Till 9.30 :- listen to cab radio, chat wid cab-mates

Post 9.30 :- Freshen up, speak to dad for sometime, watch TV, cook food, prepare bed, wash clothes, surf net, blog

By 1 – Go to bed

Relationships!

Nowadays logging on to Facebook is a pain. Every single minute someone is uploading their marriage pics or changing their status from “single” to “committed” or “married”. As if I’m the only alien left on planet earth with no one to commit to.

Is it good or bad. I’m 27 and single(by choice so far). Don’t mind committing though! But no one even daring to propose only…am I that scary or what?

“Eating” Friday!

Yay! It’s Friday! And it was friday indeed. No managers around. Longest breaks ever. Having fun on the floor. Supervisors trying to turn a blind eye on everything. That’s what it seemed. Will get to know on Tuesday what’s the outcome. Whether they really turned a blind eye or they are blasting in meeting rooms. 

Everyone brought food on the floor whole day and at any given point we would be eating…biscuits,chips,peanuts,Pepsi…u name it we had it. For lunch had Chicken Biryani 😀

Sagu turned up for office and invited to her bay. Had fish fry, masala fish, chicken fry, mango rice, methi pulao,gulab jamun…yummy. Yeah, their project was having potluck and it was immense fun eating the food. 

Returned home to finish off mu Upma which I had prepared for dinner for myself. Finished it off with one glass of milk.

After that surfing net, removing files from laptop, packing my bags (yeah my dad n sis coming tomorrow , will be with them for next days before returning back to Bangalore life of mine).

Still in two minds thinking whether to go for interview in job consultancy or not.

All of a sudden feeling lazy n tired.